Tuesday, December 20, 2011

Romantic Text Messages to Send to Your Boyfriend

Romantic text messages to send to your boyfriend
So you want to send him a romantic text message.  A text that will make him think about you and feel all warm and fuzzy.  When doing this, it's important to remember that what is romantic to you may not feel romantic to him.  Men do think differently and they are visual creatures.  When sending him a romantic text, paint a picture in his mind for best results.  Play on his imagination.

What is romantic to a woman is not romantic to a man.  Often women send men messaged that they think of as romantic.  Think about flowers.  You may thing receiving flowers as romantic, but a man, not so much.  Romantic text messaged to send to your boyfriend could turn into messages that your girlfriends would prefer to here if you get my drift.

Men like to make women happy.  Often women screw up by sending a message that tells him how wonderful he is.  Try sending one that tells how wonderful he makes you feel or how he makes you smile.  Here is an example of the difference in the two messages below.

Wrong:  I can't stop thinking about how hot you looked last night when you __________________.

Right:  I can't stop smiling today thinking about when you did ______________ last night.

Now there really isn't anything wrong with the first message, but the second one conveys to him that he makes you happy.  It's much more romantic without being cheesy.

When sending a romantic text, think of him as the hero.  He is your hero.  He is special and makes you feel special.  Focus on how he makes you feel, not on how you hope he feels if that makes sense.  Men like to win.  Let him know that he is winning without going overboard.

If you do this the right way, you can turn him inspire him to be more romantic in return.  You can text romance into your live. You can ignite passion with the right words in a romantic text message.

Text the Romance.


Wednesday, November 30, 2011

Can You Text Your Ex Back?

Sounds crazy?  Not really.  Text messages if sent at the right time with the right words can act as triggers to men.  It can trigger emotions and feelings of the past to come up.  The think you want to focus on though is the good feelings and not the bad ones.  Timing is also a key element here.

I have texted and ex back once upon a time.  I didn't do it right after the break up though.  I waited a month or so.  I gave him time to process his emotions and time for the ugly break up memory to fade a bit.  I then send messages to him that would trigger the feelings we had before things went down hill.  He was on my doorstep within a week and we were reconciling.

I can't say enough about the timing thing.  If you start texting him right after the break up, you won't be thinking clearly.  You will be focused on your pain and your feelings and seeking gratification and relief way too soon.  After a break up a man needs time to move through his feelings and emotions.  If you start texting your ex back too soon, you will fail.

Michael Fiore has created a step by step guide on texting your ex back.  It details out what type of texts to send to trigger these feelings in your ex.  It tells you when the timing is right.  It can be done.  Yes you can text your ex back.  There are no guarantees, but if you follow his plan, your chances are far greater than if you go at it on your own.  Text Your Ex Back.

Tuesday, November 29, 2011

Are You Textually Appealing Quiz

How is your Text Appeal?  In other words, do your texts trigger excitement, attraction, warm fuzzy thoughts, and desire?  Do they have your mate longing to see you.  Take this quiz to find out if you are textually appealing or a wet blanket that conveys neediness or insecurity.

1.  If you meet a guy out and he gives you his number and says "text me", do you..
     a)  text him the next day and say something like "Hi, this is_________from________last night?
     b)  text him your number right then and there instead and say something like "You text me"
     c)  don't text him at all, if he was interested, he would have gotten your number

2.  You just had a great first date with a guy, do you
      a) text him right afterwards and tell you how great it was
      b) text him the next day to thank him
      c) you don't text him, he should be thanking you.

3.  You have been on a few dates with a guy and it looks promising, do you now text him
      a)  text him first daily
      b) start texting him goodmorning
      c)  back when he texts you

4.  You just text a guy you have been dating and he didn't reply do you
      a) text him again and maybe even again and again
      b) text him and ask him if everything is ok?
      c) do nothing, he may be busy, he will text when he can or wants to.
5.  A guy has been texting you for a few weeks, but never asks you out do you
     a)  text him suggestions for meeting up
     b)  text him sexual messages hoping to get his interest sparked
     c)  stop answering him or ask him to stop texting, you aren't looking for a pen pal

6.  A guy you have begun seeing starts these texting conversations and you
     a) love it, you text with him all day long, it's such fun
    b)  try to keep the converstation going as long as possible
    c)  text a few times, then gracefully exit the conversation

7.  You are texting back and forth with a guy and he just stops so you
      a)  text him and ask him where did he go
      b)  try to get him to continue with an interesting new message
      c)  do nothing, he got busy, he will text again later

8.  When texting with a guy who is the first to end the conversation usually
     a)  him
     b) you

1.  a -1, b-3, c- 10
2.  a- 1, b-1, c-10
3.  a-1, b-1, c-10
4  a-0,b-1,c-10
5.  a-1,b-0,c-10
6.  a-1,b-1,c-10
7.  a-1,b-1,c-10
8.  a-0, b-10

If your score was between 60 and 80, congratulations, you are textually appealing and have got it going on.  You understand that you are the prize and that you shouldn't have to do all the heavy lifting to get what you want.  You understand how to ignite attraction and sexual tension and create positive triggers in guys.  You are mysterious, and inspire guys to want to know more about you.

If your score was between 40 and 60, you are on your way, but need some improvement.  You comprehend some of the dynamics to dating and attracting guys, but you still need some work.

If your score was between 20 and 60, there is hope, but you aren't sending the right messages to guys.  Your message may be along the lines of he is more significant to you than you are to you.

If your score is under 20 or worse under 10, you have zero text appeal and you might want to do some research on the subject.  You don't understand the male-femal dynamics and how it works to build some intense attraction, not to mention sexual tension. You can start here.  Should I text him.

Text Appeal

Text The Romance


Monday, November 14, 2011

Text The Romance Back Examples and Fun!

I love the concept of text the romance back.  Some think it's silly.  Not so.  Some say texting is for teenagers.  Again, this just is not so.  This weekend, I had a lot of fun with texing with my significant other.  Friday night, we were out with a group of friends.  I was sitting next to my gossipy girlfriend and was getting annoyed to say the least.  My boyfriend was beside me, talking to one of his buds about work.  Again, that wasn't much more exciting either, so I decided to create my own excitement.

When I went to the bathroom, I took my phone.  I came up with a clever naughty text and had it ready to go.  I came back to the table, sat back down and hit send while going on about my business as if lil ole me hadn't done a thing.  My boyfriends phone chimed and he read the message.  The result?  He lost his focus and couldn't keep up the conversation with his bud.  We ended up texting back and forth a lot that night.  We stayed connected on an emotional level even amongst a crowd.  It heated up even more when we got home.

My boyfriend and I live together and often we get caught up in day to day life and stresses.  Texting has become a great connector for us.  I sometimes take my phone to the bedroom with me (I have a daughter, need I say more).  I woke up Sunday morning and my boyfriend was up.  I thought, hmmm, what can I do today?  I picked up my phone and sent him a text.  It said, "Good Morning Sweetie, I am laying here thinking of what it feels like when you do________________.  Fill in the blank.  He was laying in bed with me in 30 seconds flat.  Or you could send something like "I am laying in bed thinking about what if would feel like to do_______________to you.

These are just a few text the romance back examples.  I have found the more I do this, the more natural and creative I become at it.  The best part is, my boyfriend loves it too, it makes him feel wanted.  The best result of all is he too is learning, taking the time to also make me feel good and wanted back.  Win win!

Can you not see how texting the romance back can build a deeper emotional connections?  Is this for kids or teenagers?  I think not.

Text the Romance

Wednesday, November 9, 2011

Does Text The Romance Back Really Work

Can you really text the romance back into your relationship.  Can you ignite romance into a new relationship with a text message?  Absolutely yes you can.  I know this because I was doing this long before Michael Fiore ever wrote the book.  I did it in dating and I did it inside of relationships.  It has also been done to me.  Texting, emailing, instant messages,any electronic instant communication, it's all the same thing.  I once fell in love via email, no joke, the story is here.

It's all about building an emotional connection.  It's actually easy to do via text.  Not as much fear.  If you happen to get rejected, (which is very doubtful if you do it right), you can still plan a recovery text.  This is not so easy nor will it be as graceful face to face. Face to face, you don't have the luxury of thinking time to come up with something cleaver.

I learned in my heavy dating days that I could word my texts in a way that would produce the result I desired.  I could sit with my girlfriends, tell them what the outcome would be and hit send and wait.  Worked like a charm almost every time.  Some say this is a game, it's not.  It's just an instinctive understanding of human nature and what it craves and desires.  Give what another desires and chances are good you will get what you desire.

In text the romance back, you are given the tools or the right texts to send.  These texts are designed to make a man feel good and to... well feel like a man.  Not many men won't respond well to this.  Michael also tells you why they work.  He doesn't just lead you blindly through it.  He gives you the tools to be able to carry this out as second nature long after you have finished the book. 

For those that are skeptical, I ask you this.  How can it be a bad thing to learn to better communicate with men in a language that they relate, understand, appreciate and crave.  I believe the best bi-product of text the romance back is that it transfers over into your real life communications.  By supplying the stimulus via text and getting the reinforcement of a positive response, we learn what works and what doesn't.  It becomes easier to carry these lessons from the pc and cell phone, into our real lives.

Am I an advocate of the text message?  Yes and proudly so! 

Text the Romance Back


Wednesday, October 26, 2011

Texts to Make Him Feel Good

texts to make him feel good

Face it, men fall in love because of the way you make them feel. It only stands to reason that you want to send texts to make him feel good as well right?

Men need what I call the three A's to feel good.  They need to be appreciated, accepted and they crave affection.  If this is the case, then why not use texting as a tool to create triggers in men to these feelings.  It only makes sense.  Be creative when you text him and keep these three A's in your mind.

Men want romance, but the macho side of them often keeps them held back.  You can send texts that can make a man feel safe.  When he feels safe, he feels he has permission to be more romantic or even mushy because you have shown him you accept him.

Please note here if you are just beginning to date a man, use caution with these texts, they can back fire if used incorrectly and push him away.  You don't want to come across as too accommodating or needy. You also don't want to get ahead of him.  Let him lead. 

An example of one of these texts is pretty simple.  Lets say you had a great night last night if you know what I mean.  Simply text him mid day with something like this "You were amazing last night".  This tells him that he made you happy and men love to make women happy.  It also shows appreciation.   You can be very specific in this also.  Tell him exactly what he did that was so amazing.  Positive reinforcement.  Works like a charm.

I am not saying to text him empty compliments, be sincere but be creative.  Don't waste your text messages on things like "How is your day?".  This does not create a trigger that makes him feel good.  You want him to associate your texts with feeling good.  Triggers, it's all about triggers.  If you text him mundane things and he is busy at work, he may resent your text on a subconscious level.

So before you hit the send button, ask yourself if you are making him feel appreciated and good.  Are you making him smile.  Or you recreating memories.  This will help bond a man to you.

If you want to perfect this art of texting a man to increase passion and romance, Michael has a great program called Text the Romance Back It's worth checking into.

Wednesday, October 12, 2011

Al He Wants to Text About Is Sex

When a guy predominately texts about sex and very little else, it makes a girl wonder. Is sex all he is after? It sure seems that way. If you have engaged him prior in sex talk or sexting, it's hard to take it back. Guys don't like the rules changed in the middle of the game. If he is texting you about sex, I am assuming that you did in fact participate once upon a time. If you didn't and he is still doing it, get rid of him.

First no one dates to not have sex. It's normal. It's not really normal though to text a woman about it all the time. He does it because you have allowed it. Most guys will at least try to go there. They do this often as a qualifying process. They want to know if the woman they are talking to is relationship material or a fling material. The women that engage in this sexting and put up no boundaries are the ones they usually categorize as a fling.

If you did it all in fun, but regret it now and want to turn it around, there are several ways to go about it. The first way is more back door type. You can try this before you actually address it. When he texts you about sex, just don't answer him or when you do, change the subject. No explanation is needed. Trust me, he knows what he is doing wrong. He should slow it down after a few attempts that aren't met with reciprocation. He should get the hint.

Ah but a lot of men just don't get the hint and you will need to be more direct about this. The first thing you can text back is "Is it normal for you to talk about sex all the time with women?". This will make him evaluate. It also calls him out in a non blaming way. You are just asking a question. How is he going to answer? If he answers yes, then he looks like a douche bag. If he answers no, the door is now open for you to ask, "Then why do you do it to me?" If he answers with a lame reason, just send back, "Oh", or don't answer.

It's up to you to break him of this and establish yourself out of the fling category. If he stops texting you have your answer. He just wanted sex. I would be willing to bet that you will get an apology out of him if you handle this correctly, not to mention move out of the fling zone.

Are you breaking all the texting rules with guys? Your texting habits tell guys all sorts of things about you that you may not be aware of.  Are you textually appealing?

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/6619197

Tuesday, October 4, 2011

How To Be Mysterious Texting Guys

It's human nature to love a mystery.  It's the unknown that we often find attracts us to another.  Think about it really.  How much time do you spend analyzing a man?  You do this because of what you don't know, all the while creating a bit of fantasy in your head.  Men are the same way, trust me.  It's what they don't know that keeps them coming back for more.  You can use this to your advantage by creating mystery when texting guys.

So when learning how to be mysterious texing a guy, remember this golden rule.  Less is more.  It's the girl that engages in a text marathon that quickly loses his attention.  She is too available, to much of an open book and this offers him no challenge, not to mention there is nothing mysterious about texting a guy constantly.  If you really like him, this will be harder for you.  You want to talk, connect and chat.  Just remember, you have time.  Don't rush it.  Long term satisfaction over instant gratification.

The little smiley emoticon is one little trick I use to be mysterious when texing a guy.  When he texts a compliment or something that makes me smile, instead of engaging in too much conversation, I just send a smiley face.  This tells him he made me smile and gives him reinforcement.  It also leaves him wondering.  It's just enough to make him try again.  His goal is to get more from you.  It's mysterious to him because most girls just babble on and on.  You don't, why are you different is what he starts to think.

Have you ever noticed that the guys that you don't really like as much seem to be impossible to get rid of while the ones you do disappear more often?  This really isn't a coincidence.  Chances are you are giving more to the guy you like and less to the guy you don't.  You become a challenge to the guy you don't, he is intrigued as you seem elusive and mysterious.  The guy you do like, you are jumping every time your phone goes off and answering him immediately because you are so exited.  Challenge and mystery gone.  So it only makes sense if you want to text a guy and be myserious, text with him like you would a guy who you don't fancy so much.

This takes self control yes.  Once you practice these techniques though and begin to see results, it reinforces that it does work.  It begins to become second nature.  You are in essence training yourself with your own reward system.  Wait to text him, don't be so eagar, be cool, hold back some, and watch him move forward to find out more about you. It feels good. Texting guys is a great way to escalate attraction, use it wisely.

Be friendly and receptive, but don't give too much too soon away in your texts.  We often try to control the outcome.  We share too much when texing a guy way too fast.  A slow simmer tastes better than a rapid boil.  Less is more when texting guys and building that air of mystery.


When Texting Guys - Stop Doing This

The use of that laugh out loud, also known as lol at the end of your text could be hurting you.  Do you know people that can't send a text message without putting this at the end of it?  I know I do.  It drives me crazy.  I get a visual of the person sending it laughing at everything, even things that aren't funny.  Not a pretty picture.  Men are visual creatures.  Need I say more.

I know it sounds silly but really think about it.  When texting a guy do you need to tell him you find something funny.  Try substituting that lol with a "Now that's funny".  More personal for sure.  You are trying to build attraction here and sure a good sense of humor is attractive, but come on.  To end almost every text with that is just lame.  For more text appeal, replace that lol at the end of a sentence with something that speaks more directly to him.  Every one sends a lol, but not everyone takes the time to type out something creative to take it's place.

It also shows that you aren't confident in yourself when you use it all the time.  If you have to tell a guy you are laughing, well it's sort of defeating the purpose. You don't trust yourself enough to trust him to know you are actually laughing in some cases.  It's more powerful  when texting guys to let him wonder a bit if you found something funny or not.  It makes him try harder.  It's more of a challenge.  To send a lol is like saying, you should like me, I laugh at your jokes.  Pick me!  I am in agreement with you sort of thing.
The lol does have it's purpose. It's a great way to end a texting session.  Ever get a lol and nothing more when texting a guy?  Not much you can reply to that is it?  Ending a texting conversation first is a good way to have more text appeal.  Leave him while the conversation is good and he will be wanting more.  The lol is perfect for this.

On the other hand if he texts you a lol, stop texting him period.  It's a cut off.  To keep texting seems just desperate and will deminish your text appeal fast. A lol sent and nothing else is like a period, the end.  It takes little effort and is often saved as a pre-written message.  The lmao is no different by the way.  Use it sparingly to keep your text appeal in tact. The use of lol is just one of the many tips to increase your textual attraction.


Saturday, September 24, 2011

When Should I Text Him

Usually the time we struggle most with the question of should I text him is in the beginning of dating or when we have just met a guy we find attractive and interesting. A guy we would like to get to know. We want to reach out and push things along. This time in the beginning is when you should be texting and calling him the least.

When texting guys, it's okay to answer them if they text first of course. It's not okay to initiate. If you send the first text every time, how do you know if he is really really interested? If you think that because he always replies so he must be interested, you could be very wrong. Guys that allow the women to pursue them that they aren't pursuing are often setting you up to be the girl for now, not the girl he falls in love with. It's easy, why turn down easy?

I know women who will text a guy and if she gets no reply, she texts him again. This is not good, don't do this. If he isn't answering, there is a reason. If you are one of these women that then will think, "what if he didn't get it", chill out. Have you ever went back into your sent messages to make sure the text message actually went? If by chance he didn't get it, if he is interested, he will text you soon enough, relax. If he doesn't, he isn't that into you. You texting him again will only make you appear desperate, so no don't text him again. It's an attraction buzz killer!

I also know women who will think up reasons to text him. They have some sort of information that they feel will be of interest to him, so they use that as an excuse to make contact. The only time it's okay to text him first with such information is if is also doing the same type of sharing with you. Don't over share and don't be the first to share. Let him come to you.

As a rule when you should text him is only if he texts you first. There really is no other reason to text him unless he is your boyfriend already and your relationship is established. Texting a guy everyday like so many women do will kill his attraction, not grow it. It equals to a guy a girl who is pushing for a relationship. Pushing makes guys run.

Texting a guy the right thing at the right time can drive his attraction through the roof. You can convey mystery, allure, flirting and bring him closer with a change in your texting techniques alone.

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/6576775

Sunday, September 11, 2011

Texting Him Good Morning

Do you text your boyfriend Good morning?  Do you do it daily or almost daily?  If so, how sweet, but I hope you are in a committed relationship with this man that you are are being so sweet to everyday.  I know many women who text guys they have only been casual dating with for a short time.  This is when it is a mistake.  If you are consistently texting him Good morning, it's like you are acting like a girlfriend way too fast.  This is one of the ways to run a man to the hills, acting like a girlfriend when he isn't or doesn't see himself as your boyfriend, yet.......

It shows a man you are into him and that's all fine and well, but it deprives him of the role of pursuer.  Men like to pursue.  Sure the easier, more available women will get a reply, why give up an easy thing.  She will rarely end up the woman he wants to have a relationship with.  The woman he commits to will be a woman that he had to work for and wasn't so available or eager.

If you are going to text him Good morning, do so sparingly and just because he might have texted you Good Morning a time or two does not mean you should return the gesture.  If he texts your first, sure respond, but never ever in the early stages text him Good Morning First.  Let the man lead.  Also if you are pursuing, how on earth will you ever be sure if he does in fact like and respect you?  You can't.  If feels very good when they text you first.  It tells you that yes he is into you and will save you from a lot of guess work down the road if you can start out feeling secure.

I know you probably want to send him sweet good morning text messages, but seriously this puts the masculine and feminine in opposite roles.  A man needs to remain in his masculine to feel good and if you are doing his job for him, how can he?  

If he isn't texting you good morning or texting you first, he isn't that interested and you texting him will only reinforce that he isn't interested.  Men really do like a challenge.  There are lots of ways you can use texting to increase attraction and get and keep his interest.  Texting him Good Morning is dull and mundane, although a sweet thing to do on occasion.  Routines are boring, don't get into them with your texting.  Boring equates to loss of attraction.

Text Appeal

Tuesday, August 16, 2011

How to Text a Man and Make Him Addicted to You

It doesn't matter if you are single, dating, in a relationship or married. You can ignite a spark with a well thought out well delivered text message. To be successful with this technique, it is critical to have an understanding of the male mind. Men are visual. You have to be able to paint pictures to make him addicted to you.

If you are new to dating a man, it's best to do this more subtle like. Save the more to the point texts for those married or in a stable relationship. If this is a guy you are just dating, the techniques will vary from those if your relationship is established mainly because in the beginning it's best not to initiate with a man. This means you will have to execute your responses to his texts accordingly. By not initiating with the man you aren't chasing him. Men are getting used to women taking the lead. This does not mean they like it. By letting him lead, you stand out from the rest and this alone can make him addicted.

If you are already in a relationship, you can create more visual pictures for the man and be more to the point. This is not something you want to do everyday. Being predictable will not make him addicted to you. Being unpredictable will. If you are always texting him mundane things like when is he coming home or can he stop at the store, toss in a message with some sexual play to it out of the blue. Do this on occasion, not daily. You can start with something as simple as "I can't stop thinking about you today". He will inquire as to why, which is when you refer to something the two of you did in the bedroom if you get my drift. He will instantly remember that time and start thinking about it and you.

To get a man addicted to you, you create positive triggers to positive things you have shared. This builds an emotional connection. This is why texting works so well. Your ring tone, your name on his cell screen become triggers to him. Triggers of passion, and warm fuzzy feelings. When we have addictions in our lives, we think about them often. This is what you want to do with your texts. Get him thinking about you. Not you and what's for dinner. That's annoying and creates negative non addicting thoughts.

Find out what thousand of other women have already discovered about texting men and how it can escalate your romance to new levels.

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/6495655

Monday, August 8, 2011

How To Rekindle Your Relationship With a Text Message

If you are feeling a disconnect from your partner, you are probably longing for the man he was when you first met. We all do this I believe. The man that wowed us in the beginning when he was trying to win us seems to have disappeared. No flowers, romantic dinners or weekends. No afternoon phone calls saying he is thinking of you. The romance is gone. So how can you rekindle your relationship?

Men want to feel like the hero. Men need to feel like men. They also need to feel they are making us happy. You of course could go into therapy but that takes time and puts on pressure. You want to take the pressure off and allow him to feel like a man again.
What I am going to suggest is an different romance idea. You cell phone is your quickest easiest way to rekindle your relationship fast. A text message. Before you click off of this article, I hope you will hear me out. A text message can act as a huge trigger. You have heard of Pavlov's dog and triggers right? That is what I am going to suggest you do with text messages. Create positive triggers for your partner that inspire him to naturally rekindle the romance.

I know this works. I am queen of the text message. I learned it from a few very skilled partners over the last few years. I had a long term relationship with a man who never texted me boring mundane things. He was always pushing my emotional buttons in text messages and had a way to get me going. I had a ring tone assigned to him. Anytime I heard that ring tone, eventually my heart skipped a beat. The ring tone was a trigger. I would feel euphoric when I heard it. It only makes sense that texting is a huge romance idea or way to get romance back.

This trigger changed when we broke up. Then if and when he texted of called, the trigger changed to deep sadness. Triggers are powerful and can bring about some deep emotions. If you want to know how to rekindle your relationship fast, start creating positive triggers with your text messages.

No more texting him mundane details. No more asking him to stop for milk or bread or asking him when is he coming home. Use texts messages for positive things. Make him feel like a man with your text messages. The first text that I suggest you send is this. "I can't stop thinking about you today". Wait and see where he takes this message. You can gently lead him in the right direction and have him thinking some pretty good thoughts about you with this message. Send it out of the blue, maybe the middle of the day.

I never asked my significant other when is he getting off work. I have him trained now. I would text "When are you getting off?". After much practice and now that his triggers are set, he always comes back with something spicy and often very romantic or sexy. He has learned to read into my texts because I have set the triggers.

Texting is a fast way how to rekindle a relationship. It beats nagging and telling him what it is he isn't doing anymore. Men don't really respond to us talking to them, it's actions that get their attention. Consider that yes you can text the romance back.

These techniques have been on the Rachel Raye show. Hundreds of women in the audience and thousands around the world have sat with their mouth open at the effectiveness of these texting the romance back techniques.

Text Back Your Romance

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/6451853

Friday, July 29, 2011

Text Him In Love

Some think texting is for teenagers. They think it's silly and that it hinders real communication. While there may be some truth to this there are a few things you might want to think about before dismissing texting as a tool to enhance your relationship.

A few years ago I was in a relationship with a man that used texting a lot. I don't know if he just knew how to do it instinctively or if he had read one of the online texting guides but I do know this. His texts always made me smile. I had a ring tone assigned to this man. His texts were never mundane, always playful and he never texted me to death. The result. Every time I heard that ring tone, my heart would skip a few beats. I would get excited to hear from him. He was creating triggers and his texts helped me to fall in love with him.

He knowingly or unknowingly created a trigger with his texts. His texts would trigger a euphoric feeling in me. This trigger was so strong. Triggers can also change. He broke up with me. I was heart broke. Anytime after that if he called or texted and I heard that ring tone, it triggered deep sadness. I had to change his ring tone. Triggers can be powerful. They can cause us to feel deep strong emotions.

What are your texts triggering in your guy? Do you text mundane things like can you bring home the milk? Do you use your texts to say you are running late, or convey any other boring details. If so, you aren't texting love. Your texts are not positive triggers. If you can learn to text him things that give him warm fuzzy feelings, you can cement your emotional attraction further and deeper. Yes you can text him in love.
Triggers are powerful. Think about an addict. What is one of the first things an addict has to do to break free of an addiction. He has to remove the triggers. That cup of coffee that triggers the cigarette. Texting love is like creating an addiction with your triggers. He becomes addicted to you.

Stop using texts to your man for anything other than texting love or fun loving things. Create that trigger in him with your texts and help him fall in love with you using these triggers as a tool. You can be playful, or sexual, and engage his imagination with text messages. Your texts become something that is just between you and him. It's those little things that add up and grow emotional attraction and yes text love!

I can also remember how it felt when I didn't get a text from a particular man. It didn't feel good. This only worked to heighten the effect of the trigger he created. I would feel relief when I did hear from him. Relief, another positive trigger was created. It's a bit like Pavlov's dog if you think about it. You can text him in love
Learn how to text your guy into a romance and love. Hundreds of women are using this tool to enhance and grow their relationships to new levels.


Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Robin_Cockrell

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/6449120

Friday, July 22, 2011

How to Text a Guy

We all have triggers in our lives. Triggers that make us react or feel a certain way. Triggers that cause us to crave or want certain things. If you are a smoker, you know how that cup of coffee makes you want a cigarette. The coffee without the cigarette just doesn't seem the same. Music can be a trigger. Ever heard a song and you were instantly taken back and you felt just how you felt at the time the song came out. I can hear the song Kung Fu Fighting and instantly feel like I did at the age of 13 skating at a skating rink holding the hand of my latest crush.

I dated a man once, and fell in love with him by the way. I had a ring tone assigned to him. Barracuda by Heart. Every time my phone rang with that tone, my heart beat a little faster. The man also just happened to be, I see in hindsight, very good at texting. It was never anything dull. He was always funny and always picking on me and pushing my buttons. It built attraction. The ring tone became a trigger to a euphoric feeling. He later dumped me and the trigger changed for me. If he happened to call after the break up, the sound of that tone caused me apprehension. Triggers are powerful. I had to change the ring tone to keep my sanity.

Texting can act as a trigger. It's up to you if you want that trigger to make him feel good or bring on apprehension or even feelings of nothing. If you text him to pick up milk on his way home, or ask what time is he coming home, or just mundane things, the sight of your name on his cell phone screen becomes a negative trigger. You can change that.

If on the other hand you send him racy messages, messages that confirm his masculinity (do so sparingly by the way), your name on his screen becomes a positive trigger. It triggers a good warm fuzzy feeling and only secures the emotional attraction.

If he happens to have a ring tone assigned to you the effect of triggers is even more powerful. If you have an assigned ring tone and you have been sending the mundane messages, your first step is to get that ring tone changes. It' will be far easier to follow this texting guide by Michael if you start out fresh. It's easier to set new triggers than to over ride old ones. You don't want the two to get crossed up.

Triggers are powerful. This is why texting can be so effective to bring back the romance and turn your clueless man or drifting man into a Prince Charming, romantic dream guy.

Carolina Robin

Monday, July 18, 2011

When He Never Texts First

he never texts first

When he never texts first, it makes a girl wonder doesn't it. I mean he answers you so all must be well.  Still, something feels off if you are the one doing all the work and there is a good reason it feels this way. Read More......

Thursday, July 14, 2011

Texting Tips to Spice It Up

Want to add some spice to your relationship?  Texting may just be you answer.  Sound strange?  Not really.  Men are visual.  You can use text messages to stimulate his imagination and he will get the visual effects.  It will get you on his mind and have him thinking about you all day long if you sext him or text him right.

One little sentence can do wonders.  I had a group of women text this one sentence this week.  I can't stop thinking about you.  The results were amazing.  This is really effective done in the middle or late afternoon when you know you are going to see him that night.  If it's out of your character, even more effective.  It gets him so curious.  You job is to roll with his lead from there, be creative, playful and fun.  Get his motor going.

I texted my guy this last week.  "I have had a long hard day and could really use a stiff one"  Now this could mean a drink as we all know.  Do you think he visualized a drink though?  Really?  Oh he came and got me and took me for a drink, but he was so distracted it was just funny.  He kept rubbing my legs, and was really in tune, I must say.

Another good technique is to use the I know something you don't technique. I have a secret.  This can be done countless ways.  An example.  Oh if you only knew what I was thinking.  Then you play with him a little.  Give him some hints.  Play around.  This is also known as sexting.

Men are really easy to spice up.  Just text something with a double meaning playfully to let him know you are open to his come back.  You want to inspire him and his fantasies with your sext messages.  You want to stimulate his imagination so that he will get those visual pictures in his head.  Men are visual and that is a fact.

I have seen women literally turn the heat and romance on full force in men that they felt were taking them for granted with a few text messages.  It's powerful stuff.  It's also great fun.  If you want to spice it up there are tons of texting and sexting tips here.  Text the Romance. This guy has been on Rachael Raye and has had women in the audience testing his techniques live.  Amazing results. 

Wednesday, July 13, 2011

Why Men Stop Calling or Texting

It happens a lot.  Men stop calling or texting.  They could be coming on full force, texting marathons, or calling everyday or often.  We feel we were sent mixed signals and wonder why men stop calling and texting.  The truth here, maybe he didn't send mixed signals at all.  Women tend to often jump ahead and assume that a relationship is happening when the man is on an entirely different page.

 There are many reasons why men stop calling though.  How available were you?  Were you a challenge?  Did you offer up any resistance at all?  Men really do like a challenge.  They like the chase, they were born that way.  Guys stop calling sometimes because they are just bored or the chase is gone.  Seems unfair?  Not really.  Usually when a man stops calling it's in the early stages of dating.  He is qualifying you.  You should be qualifying him as well, meaning you don't put all your eggs into his basket too soon.  As long as you aren't invested too much too soon, it shouldn't matter much if he stops calling or not.

Why men stop texting is because you invest too much too soon!

why men stop texting
Speaking over over investing, this is the main reason men stop texting and calling.  They can feel your energy.  They can tell if you are more invested or ahead of them in the relationship.  Most women go into dating with the expectation that it should turn into a relationship.  Men don't really approach dating like this.  

Another reason a man stops calling or texting is simply this.  You picked the wrong man.  Think about it.  Do you really want a man that just drops off the face of the earth?  Probably not.  In the beginning of dating, you are sizing him up, not the other way around.  Keep that attitude and he will feel it.  The take it or leave it or the I haven't quite made up my mind about you yet attitude will get you much further.

You more than likely if a man has stopped calling and texting you are wondering what did you do.  Did he meet someone else?  Did he go back to his ex?  Did I say something or do something wrong?  Why am I not good enough?  These thoughts are pointless and will get you nowhere and won't make him call again.  He is either into you or not.  If you have to guess or wonder, he probably is not.

If you really are tired of men disappearing, of men stopping contact, it's time to make some changes in one of two areas.  Either in the men you are selecting or accepting or either in the way you react or respond in the early stages of dating.  Are you one of those women that sends men unknowingly to the hills.

Why He Disappeared is the best resource I have come across yet on helping you stop the disappearing man syndrome.  I endorse it, believe in it and highly suggest it.  I haven't had a man stop calling me in a very very long time.

Why He Disappeared!


Monday, July 11, 2011

Sexting Tips - He Always Talks About Sex in His Texts

I have a forum for women. All sorts of topics come up there, all about dealing with men, dating and relationships.  There is a sexting tips thread there.  While sexting can be fun and add a spark to your relationship, too much is not a good thing. 

Recently a woman wanted some sexting tips, well we all chimed in a gave them to her, but it back fired on her.  now when he texts or should I say sexts her, it's always about sex.  She is beginning to wonder if that is all he likes her for.  I can't say that I blame her.  We gave her the sexting tips, but left out the consequences it could cause her.  Sexting is fun, but can really get out of hand.  We women want to be values for more than our kitties or ability to give a blow job.  We have hearts, brains and minds we want guys to see as well.

The place she screwed up is not really in what she sexted, but the fact that she did it at the very beginning of dating.  If you do this at the first few weeks or months or two, well this is when you are laying the groundwork for how a man treats you.  I can give you hundreds of sexting tips but please hold onto them until your relationship is started and off the ground.

You see, men are boys, they love this sexting stuff and they will run with it.  You can type a message that your cat died and put something about his big firm penis in the same message and he will miss the cat part completely.  Maybe not this bad but you get my point.  They are going to run with the sex everytime unless he is a man with a few hang ups.  If you want a man to see you as you are, leave the sexting tips until later, otherwise it's going to be hard to back track.   

Changing the rules in midstream confuses a man.  If you start out using these sexting tips, then ask that he stop, you are sending mixed signals.  Something we accuse them of so often. 

It a man starts up on the sexting before you do and it's early in the game this is the best time to see his true colors.  You don't have to be rude or ugly about it, but you can let him know that you aren't comfortable with that.  Sometimes ignoring such texts or changing the subject will do the trick and he gets the hint.  Other times you may need to just tell him, nicely of course.  Something like "I am flattered, but that sort of makes me uncomfortable until we know one another better".  His reaction is your sign.  If he accepts, good for him, if he reacts like a child, go ahead and toss him now.  He just wants sex.

Sexting tips, oh I have many and will write them all down soon.  It's fun, it can rekindle a spark, it can make your relationship more fun and exciting when done at the right time.  If done too soon though, it will set you up as a sex object and leaving you struggling to change his perception of you.  Don't fall into this trap.  The woman I spoke of above did finally have to claw her way out of the corner she had backed herself into.  She managed, and he stuck around, but she was stressing for weeks prior wondering how on earth to get him off the sex and into her.

Sexting Tips


Tuesday, June 28, 2011

Sexting Men - Creating Visual Affects

When some think of sexting, they think of sending naked pics to their love interests.  It's so much more fun to just play with their imaginations than to send out and out naked pics.  There is an art to sexting the right way.

Men are visual creatures.  They take visuals and turn them all around in their imagination.  You can build some serious sexual tension via sexting creating visuals for men in their heads.

Simple words can do wonders.  Take sweat for example.  It's summer now.  It's hot.  If you can mention you are soaking wet with sweat, I promise you his mind wanders.  It's just the way the male brain is wired.  Play on these sorts of words.

I had a man going once with his glasses, as in reading glasses.  I texted him how sexy he was in his reading glasses.  He texted back, then I went further how I was thinking about removing them.  His imagination did the rest of the work for me as he visualized what would happen once I removed them.  Sexual tension Oh la la.

Ever told a man you weren't wearing any panties?  Even though he can't actually see you aren't wearing any panties, it drives him wild.  He can't focus anymore.  He is distracted and just wants to get you home.  This is what you want to do, create those visuals with your texts/sexts.

The more you play with this, the more natural you will get at it.  Look for opportunities in his texts to turn them into sexts, without be raunchy or explicit.  His imagination is your best weapon for building sexual tension.  Teasing is fun and the funny thing about teasing is it not only builds sexual tension, but can build on the emotional attraction as well.  


Wednesday, May 18, 2011

Sexting Tips for Women

Below is a video I recorded for sexting tips and texting tips. Enjoy. I am currently working on a real guide with real examples and real conversations. Another great texting guide is here. Text Appeal.

Sexting Tips For Women

Thursday, May 12, 2011

Sexting Tips - The Backstory

Sexting, the act of flirting with text messages is fast becoming the most popular dating tool. If you doubt this, let's trace how it has evolved. We are moving fast into a world where instant gratification seems to rule due to the rapid advancement of technology.

Two years ago if you were to search the term sexting in Google, you may find it is largely something common among teenagers and was viewed as child pornography. It didn't really surface until 2005. There really wasn't much out there on it until rather recently. 6 months ago, a search of it would not bring up Wikipedia. If you search this term now, Wikipedia comes up in the first spot in Google, definition in tact. Still on the first page now, further down, maybe ranked 5 or 6, you will find it used as a means of flirting with the opposite sex.

Have you seen the new AT&T commercial? The two guys on the ski lift? One guy is texting the other guy's ex girlfriend. The responses are fast and he is securing a date from his cell phone right on the ski lift via text message. The other guy grabs the phone and throws it into oblivion. Even the media is catching onto this trend and using it to promote the new high tech phones.

About 18 months ago, if you wanted to know how to flirt with text messages or sexting as it is now called, you would find little information online. Google texting tips or sexting tips now and see what your options are. Pages and pages. There are guides out there now to teach you how to do this. Some are better than others

Interesting thing about this is that most of it is geared towards men, like 80%. There are forums and sites out there teaching what a lot of guys now know as the texting and online game. They are teaching these guys how to use texting to it's full potential to attract, date and sleep with women. The thing is it works.

The fact is that texting really is an effective tool to attract the opposite sex, build sexual tension and escalate your love life in general. The guys have a jump start it appears as most of the information online is geared towards men.. It started with a guy named Tyler Trey who wrote one of the first texting guides for guys. I don't know about the rest of you girls, but I swear I have dated some of these trained sexters. There have been a few that could keep me intrigued with what was coming across next. Then there are the guys you wish would get these guides because they are so dull.

If you are going to be out there dating, it's in your best interest to learn these sexting tips and techniques. Flirting with text messages can and will enhance your success, not to mention it can be a lot of fun. A year from now, if you Google sexting, I promise it will be about flirting with text messaging and not teen porn.

Sexting works to build up some intense attraction. If you aren't doing it, you are missing the boat. I have been hooked by a skilled texter and I have hooked by being skilled a skilled texter. These skills carry over also if you are dating online. You can increase your magnetism by flirting with text messages.

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/6256958

Sunday, May 1, 2011

Sexting Tips for Girls

There is texting with a guy and there is sexting with a guy. Guys love it when we talk dirty to them, face it. There is a right way and a wrong way though. Granted a guy would love it if you would just come right out and say things, you know you want to suck this or that sort of thing, but that doesn't really engage his imagination as much.

The best sexting tip I can give you is this. Engage his imagination, build up to it before you start talking dirty. Men are visual creatures, make them visualize with your text messages. This is how you ease into sexting.

Examples are things like when he texts and asks what's up, there are many replies you can come up with to create images in his mind. "I just got out of a hot bubble bath", "I am lathering up with sunscreen about to head to the pool". "Trying to get my jeans unzipped, the zipper is stuck". You get my point. Get them to visualize you bending over, laying down, or the top one is on your knees.

Once you get the conversation rolling, it's up to you how dirty you want to talk to him or if you just want to keep the sexting to a flirty level and keep the anticipation. After a few exchange of messages, it you are doing a good job, he is probably going to send you amessage something like "You are killing me", "You are driving me crazy" sort of thing. If you manage this, you can bet he is thinking about you now.

Sexting tips, texting tips and learning to talk dirty to your guy can bring a stale relationship back to life, it can ignite a new relationship and most of all, it's just downright fun.


Friday, April 29, 2011

Should I Call Him - Should I Email Him

You are sitting there staring at your phone or maybe your computer screen contemplating should I call him, should I email him. whichever one you are struggling with, they are both about should you contact him.

It depends on your motives for calling him or emailing him. What is it that you hope to gain? A date? A confirmation that he is into you? Access your motives first, because more times than not calling men or emailing me, initiating that contact is you seeking some form of validation from him.

If he isn't giving it to you of his own free will and needs you to lead and hold his hand, well, more than likely you are better off to step away from the phone, step away from the computer. It's not going to make him like you anymore. It's not going to attract him.

Quite the opposite. You are depriving him of the chase. I know a lot of women who email or call men when they haven't heard from him in as little as a days time. Patience I am going to tell you pays off. It feels so much better to see his name pop up in your inbox knowing he did it because he wanted to. It feels so good to see his name on your cell phone screen because then you know he was thinking of you and you did nothing to force this.

Another thing to remember when you are wondering should I call him, should I email him is this. If you do and he doesn't respond right away, leave it alone. If you keep on, he is going to think of you as needy and will dismiss any relationship potential that you may have had with him.

If you are going to play the calling, texting and emailing games with a man, you best get it down and learn to do it right. A man can learn a lot about you by how you handle these media forms. These things alone are big clues to him as to if you will make good girlfriend or relationship, even marriage material.

If you want to know all about how and when to call me and how it plays such a huge role in weather he chooses you for more than friends, please check out Mimi Tanner's book. It's the bomb and has all you ever need to know about calling, texting and emailing men.

Friday, April 8, 2011

Guys and Texting

I think we have established that guys are into the texting now. Google it, check it out. The market is now so saturated with products teaching guys how to seduce and flirt with women it's not even funny. They call it the online and texting game.

Are you prepared to keep up with them. They are on these pick up forums all over the web, learning these successful techniques. They remark about the women that give them dull responses. They choose their words and techniques carefully to get the results they desire. Some of these guys play a mean texting game.

Can you play it back. Can you escalate a man's attraction and have him dying to see you with a simple text message and technique? If you can't, you are missing out on the biggest dating tool you have access to. Your cell phone. Flirting over text messages can be powerful to say the least, otherwise these gurus would not be making a killing off of it.

You can check out text appeal here, currently one of the few e-books available for women regarding texting. Stay tuned though, I am currently working on one to blow these guys out the water, coming soon.

Sunday, April 3, 2011

Sexting - Flirty Text Messages

Sexting is a term widely becoming known as flirting with text messages. This new dating tool is rapidly taking the dating world by swarm. Sexting has evolved in the last few years as can be proven in the search engines and the media.

In 2005 Sexting was something common among teenagers. There was a lot of controversy with this topic. New laws had to be put in place regarding child pornography. If you googled this term up to about a year ago, that was the only information to be had on Sexting. Texting wasn't even around then, let alone sexting or flirting with text messages.

6 months ago had you done a search on Sexting, Wikipedia would not have even shown up. Now if you google it, Wikipedia is in first place with the history of sexting. The definition of it does not include flirting with text messages or it's us as a dating tool, but you can bet it will.

The cell phone carriers are even taking advantage of texting to be about flirting with text and dating. Have you seen the commercial with the 2 guys in the ski lift. The guy on the right is texting the guy on the lefts ex girlfriend and securing a date. The messages are going instantly and he has a date in about 20 seconds. It ends with the guy on the left throwing his friend's phone off the ski lift.

Google sexting now and starting on page two, the results are about flriting with text messages. There are blogs, websites and now guides you can purchase about the texting and online game. It's generally geared towards men, but the woman aren't far behind. They are fast learning they have to be able to keep up when it comes to texting.

The fact of the matter is this. Sexting or Flirting with text messages is a great dating tool. If you use some good techniques you can escalate your love life to much higher levels. It can build and enhance attraction if used the right way.

I have had some skilled guys text me, they could have me about to dye to see me. I have also had those guys that bored me to tears. If you aren't using texting as sexting, you may get left behind. Allmost all women text and they expect men to know how to use this means of communication. I roll my eyes when a man tells me he doesn't text. I think he must be an antique or something and I am immediately disappointed. if you aren't sending flirty text messages, you are missing the boat.

Thursday, March 31, 2011

Why He Texts and Doesn't Call

What's up with men and texting these days? Did they forget how to use the phone. Truth is, this has become their number one dating tool and some of them have planned tactics when it comes to texting.

Texting is easy. For men, it means less chance of feeling the rejection. They get to plan what the say and think it out. Some men these days rarely use the phone. Sad but true. A lot of the women are adapting to this. You see women everywhere with their phones texting. In grocery stores, department stores, walking or heaven forbid, driving. It's simply easier, less risky than a phone call. No one on the other end to tell you they are busy or it's not a good time. Almost zero chance of rejection.

What a lot of women don't know is these men are in with the dating gurus. There are a lot of programs out there that teach what they call an online and texting game. It's getting more and more common. In a couple of years, it's going to be common knowledge for men that they can up their texting game and attract more women. When it comes to texting men, many of them are way ahead of you here.

The truth of the matter is these taught techniques actually do work on women. They teach men how to be witty, funny and they teach them tactics that will increase your attraction. When it comes to men and texting, they are harmlessly for the most part just trying to attract more women. You really can't blame them for that.

Now some of these programs teach some techniques that aren't so nice. There is a tactic that guys use to get you to chase them. It's sort of like cat and mouse. They just stop texting you for a few days after coming on strong. Think about it, it works more times than not. The woman is used to hearing from him, then he just stops. It's human instinct to go after him.

Then when she initiates, he plays a few more games on her. If you aren't familiar with these techniques, they can hit you blind sided. Her you are on a roller coaster ride and he is just trying to get your attention. Most times, he does.

So knowing these tactics are going to become more and more common, it's fair to say you should, as a woman be prepared with a few tactics of your own to stay one step ahead. These guys are onto something, texting if done correctly, can increase attraction. So why not play the game with them and be better at it. If men are taking lessons to learn how to text women, then we need to be prepared. We need to learn how to text men in return.

Texting is the way of the future. The more prominent is becomes, the more of these guides you will see popping up. Some are very good. Attraction can build to some pretty intense levels in text messaging. The guys are jumping on this, don't you think you should catch up? http://www.therulesforcallingmen.com

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/6046419

Monday, March 28, 2011

Building Sexual Tension Texting Guys

This is really simple. It's sort of goes parallel with playing hard to get. It's about making him wait a bit before you give into his advances. Anticipation and building up to meeting a guy actually is sexual tension.

How do you do this, build this sexual tension. If he is texting you, asking you questions, don't always answer him so readily. Maybe even answer his question with a question. Inspire him to be creative to get your attention and your time. Now by all means, keep flirting, tossing him crumbs so he will know you could be interested.

It's sort of about keeping him guessing. He won't know if you are into him or not, but he thinks you could be. Think about playing the slot machine. It's the little wins that keep you playing in hopes of winning the jackpot.

You don't want to do this too long as he may give up. A week is good, if he is a patient sort, maybe a little longer. You want him to get excited about meeting you. If you meet a guy right off the bat, he isn't going to be that excited. He will be excited more if he had to work for it. We all know we value that which we work for.

When he texts you, don't answer him right away, but usually do answer in the same day. This paces the texting conversation. Occasionally do wait a day. If you pace him with your texting, you are in control. It prolongs the meeting, which is what you want to do. The longer he waits, the more excited he is going to be.

He may be telling his friends after a few days. "This girl texts me, and she seems interested, but I just don't know". If you can get him thinking like this, you got the sexual tension building. His imagination starts to do your work for you. A man's imagination is where the sexual tension is built.

Sexual tension is not really built with words, it's more about techniques, which you can learn more of here.

Sunday, March 6, 2011

Should I Text Him First

Should you text a guy first? Most of you that follow my blogs or articles know I am not an advocate of this, but nothing ventured nothing gained. Maybe he is shy, maybe he doesn't know if you are interested. If you are thinking this way and you feel you must text him, go ahead, but follow these guidelines below.

Text him once. Be witty and light. Be fun. Don't send a lame good morning or how is your day. If you can't be creative, step away from the phone. You don't want to come across as dull or boring. You want to grab his attention.

Second don't engage in a texting marathon. If he replies and appears to be happy to hear from you, a couple texts back and forth is enough. He now knows you are interested, stop while you are ahead. When texting guys, less is more. If you can leave him with a positive feeling, and don't go into overkill, chances are he may want to talk with you again.

If the guy doesn't text you back, don't text him again. You just showed him your interest, anything more will come across as desperate.

A couple of weeks ago, a friend of mine had a guy give her his number. He put it in her phone. He did not get her number. Now we all say this means he isn't interested, but that is not always the case. She had to text him first. There was no other way to see if he was or was not interested. She alluded to something they talked about and hit the send button. He texted her back immediately.

She did not engage him in marathon texting. She remained mysterious and she kept him guessing. She ended the conversation quickly. Next day he started texting her. Fast forward a week and they had their first date.

There are times when texting first in appropriate. As long as you don't become a pest and chase him, it's all good when texting a guy first. Be sensible about it and play it cool.

Some guys need a little encouragement. Text him first by tossing him the ball and see if he serves it back, but never serve it twice if he isn't returning.
What Men Secretly Want

Thursday, February 10, 2011

Are You Texting Him to Death?

I am writing this topic because just recently I was dating a text-aholic. It made me think about some women I know that text their boyfriends or even new boyfriends relentlessly. This guy he did that. At first it was sweet. You know how it is when you first meet someone that interests you. You have those rose colored glasses on.

Fast forward a few of weeks. I could set my clock by this guy. One in the morning saying the exact same thing every single day. Then a call mid morning, a text at lunch, one in the afternoon, a call at night, and a goodnight text. I almost lost my mind. I would tell him, don't get me wrong, but it didn't help. I hated it, he was a nice guy.

Anyway, he would slow down for a day or so, and then right back at it. I told him many times, so finally, I let him go. It was more to it than how often he texted me and how it annoyed me. It was about me telling him and him not paying attention nor respecting my wishes. No discussion of compromise on this issue. He walked right over my boundaries. This is grounds for dumping in my book, it's my #1 deal breaker.

So ladies, remember this when you want to text a man to death. It kills all attraction and is annoying as crap. Less is More!

Thursday, February 3, 2011

He Texts Me All The Time

You know the drill. You meet a guy. You never know if he is going to call you or text you or not. Some get your number and never call. Some call you a month later. Then there is the guy that texts you but never asks you out, but that is an entirely different topic.

So, you met a good guy, and he did call or text. You think, finally. Then the phone goes off again, another text. You think oh this is nice. Fast forward a couple of days of all day texts conversations and now you are thinking, wow, he must be clingy and needy.

Not necessarily so, though it is possible. A lot of guys really are clueless. They don't really know how to pursue a quality woman. They are used to needy women, because face it, there are a lot of drama queens out there. He may very well be treating you like the woman before you expected to be treated.

So assuming you are going to give him the benefit of the doubt and give him a chance, you must slow him down for your own sanity. You are probably worried you may hurt his feelings. Don't, he is a grown man.

So to slow him down and get him at your pace, you have to understand and accept, you are in control here. It really is the woman's job to set the pace of the relationship. If you are answering his every text, well you are telling him it's alright with you to come barreling out the gate full speed ahead.

First step is to stop answering his texts promptly. If he texts you in the morning, don't reply until after lunch. If he texts you in the meantime to inquire if you got his text, send a short reply. Tell him you are buys at work, you didn't have you phone with you. This will start setting the pace.

Keep your answers brief. If he texts you Good Morning, simply send back a smiley face. Not much to reply to a smiley face. If he keeps it up, shorten your replies and take you sweet time.

Also not every text requires an answer. If it's not a question you don't have to answer him, you aren't obligated to him and you certainly don't owe him. If he questions you about this, innocently say, well I didn't know a reply was needed to that text.

If it bothers him and he thinks you aren't interested, he will ask you. Then is your moment to tell him. You don't do this via text. You do this on the phone or in person. Light and breezy like, just tell him you don't carry your phone around on a clip on your belt. Sometimes it's in your purse. Sometimes you are just busy.

If you are engaging in a constant text conversation with a man it also shows him you are available. Do you really want to be jumping every time he calls? Do you want to set up that expectation that you will always be there answering him instantly? This backfires down the road. Nothing worse than being out with your friends and having your guy text you all night long.

By setting the pace, you will be way more mysterious and way more attractive if you keep him at bay. If he is texting you all the time, slow him down. A slow simmer is so much tastier than something brought to a rapid boil. Slow him down.

Texting is your absolute biggest dating tool. You can flirt, build attraction and get a man's attention in a bit way if you know the right techniques.

Tuesday, January 11, 2011

Should You Text a Guy First or Not?

should i text him first

Should you text a guy first or not? Of course it's not going to hurt anything to text him, except the way he views you that is. If you text him first, you will never really know if he was interested in you or not. If you text him first, well he sees you as available and he automatically knows you are into him. This is investing in him before he invests in you. Not a good idea. Men value what they have to work for. If you text him, well you just made it easy and decreased your value in his eyes.

When you text a guy first, you deprive him of the thrill of the chase and you don't get to experience that excitement you feel when he texts you first.  

Ask yourself this question. Is he stressing about if he wants to text or call you? I seriously doubt it. Is he asking his buddies should he text you, should he call you? Probably not. Guys just don't really do that. Their time table is different. A day to us seems like forever, but to them it's nothing. If you text him first you are not trusting him that he will contact you first. Guys need to feel trusted in their ability to lead.  If you lead for him, you just killed that.

You see when you text him first, it can come across as controlling.  A big downfall of many women is that they don't trust the guy to lead, and they take over and start doing the pursuing.  This feels like control to a guy and it causes them to lose interest.  

When you start texting a guy who is not texting you first you might as well wave a flag that says "pick me, pick me". How attractive is that? It's always best to mirror his level of commitment. If he is texting you, sure text him back, but if he is not, step away from the phone. Be patient. If you are asking all your girlfriends "Should I text him first", stop. Think long term satisfaction, instant gratification is short lived.

A few weeks ago I went out with my best single girlfriend. She met this great guy. He seemed so into her. They had an amazing connection. They danced, talked, laughed and at the end of the night he got her number. Hmmmm, what happened, he didn't call. Three days later she calls me and asks, "should I text him?" My answer, "No".

Now 10 days go by. She held firm to my advice. Guess what? Yep, he texted her and called. Men are getting used to being texted by women. They are getting used to women doing their work for them because so many women act on their insecurities and fall into this trap. When you do his job for him, you fall into masculine energy.  It's Feminine Energy that attracts men!

Texting a Guy First is Masculine Energy

should you text a guy first
When a woman is not so anxious he finds her more attractive. He thinks this one is different, she doesn't have to chase me. Perhaps someone is chasing her. Competitiveness will drive a man into action. Think about how he views you next time you ask the question, should I text him first. Never ever text a guy first especially in the early days. Let him enjoy the chase, it's what they do.

For texting and calling techniques that will build the attraction in a guys mind click here.

Wednesday, January 5, 2011

Texting Men - Attitude Is The Key

You wonder how attitude plays into calling men or texting. It does a lot. I can't tell you how many times I have been asked the question "He hasn't called me in days, should I call him, should I text him, maybe he thinks I am not interested". The answer is, no you should not call him, no you should not text him. The truth here is a man who is into you will call you and he will text you on a regular basis. If he doesn't well here is where the attitude comes in.

Your attitude should be the "Next" attitude. If he isn't calling, texting. keep your options open and go onto the next guy. You are way more valuable than this. You are the prize. If he can't manage a simple phone call, well down the road what is it going to be like? Once you adapt and believe this attitude, you won't really care so much if a man calls or not. You will never be sitting by the phone waiting or depending on it again. When it comes to calling men, remember sister, it's all about you. You shouldn't be calling men, they should be calling you period, end of discussion. A man that is into you will be calling and texting. If he is not consistent in his calling and texting, chances are good you are just an option. Don't call him. You are better than that. You aren't desperate.

Once you adapt the right attitude, men seem to know this. They sense it. It makes you more desirable when you aren't making him the center of your world. A funny thing starts to happen. Men start calling more. If a guy doesn't call you and you reach out to him you are doing the heavy lifting. You are telling him you are willing to invest more into him than he has to invest into you. If you are having to lead the relationship and initiate most of the calls and texts, well something is seriously wrong. Rarely will calling men get you anywhere.

There are many calling/texting men rules, but if you have the right attitude, that's really all you will need. I am not waiting by the phone for any man attitude. I am not making any man a priority when he is only making me an option attitude. Whatever you do, don't start calling men or texting men first. It takes away the chase and you steal his fun. If he is not calling you or texting you, no excuses. Excuses are what we make when we want to think of a logical reason why he isn't calling. Trust me, there rarely is one. Get busy and forget about him.